


Bell Tower

by Grey (grey853)



Category: The Sentinel
Genre: Episode Related: vowofsilence, First Times, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-05-10
Updated: 2013-05-10
Packaged: 2017-12-11 05:03:54
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,758
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/794228
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/grey853/pseuds/Grey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After "Vow of Silence" Jim discovers a spiritual side to his guide.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Bell Tower

**Author's Note:**

> Contains religious references which may be offensive to some. Don't read this if you're easily offended by the combination of religious and sexual practices as a form of fantastic lovemaking.

## Bell Tower

by Grey

Author's webpage: <http://grey.ravenshadow.net/>

* * *

Author's disclaimer: Not mine,never will be, but I've never accepted limits.

* * *

Bell Tower  
by Grey 

Walking into the loft, Jim Ellison dropped his keys in the basket, hung up his jacket, and actually let out a loud sigh as he stood there drinking in the pleasure of just being home. Moving past him, his bag still in hand, Blair walked into his bedroom and shut the door, hard. Damn. 

Rubbing his entire face with a swipe of his hand, Jim tried to be patient. His partner would talk to him when he got good and ready. Picking up his luggage from just outside the doorway, he locked up and headed upstairs to unpack. 

Putting the case on the bed, he sat down beside it and tried to think back over the retreat gone wrong at St. Sebastian's. One man murdered, another shot, his partner too pissed to speak, all managed to totally screw up his vacation plans with Blair. His young friend's surprise of going to a monastery did more than backfire. It'd put them both at risk again. Even so, after all the gunfire, Jim actually used the chapel to pray for the first time in ages. Blair survived. God came through big time, finally, and Jim thanked him. 

The rattle of metal from the kitchen signaled Blair's movements as he put water on the stove and made coffee. Taking a deep breath, Jim left his clothes packed, an anal retentive no-no, and headed downstairs. Leaning against the beam, arms crossed, Jim watched as his guide continued to ignore him. "Okay, Chief, enough already with the vow of silence. I said I was sorry." 

Reaching over his head to the cupboard, Blair brought down two mugs, and continued his quiet work at fixing dinner. "Damn, Chief. Why do you have to be so stubborn? You didn't say a word on the bus or all the way back in the truck. How long do you plan to do this silent treatment?" 

Stopping mid-step, Blair turned and stared at Jim, his eyes dark blue and piercing. The pain the older man saw there wounded more deeply than any slap could, bruised worse than any angry punch to the gut. Shit, Jim hated that look, especially when he knew full well he'd caused it. 

"You let me believe Marcus was dead, Jim. Do you have any idea how much that hurt? Do you?" 

"I'm sorry, Chief." 

"You said that already. So what? You didn't answer my question." Blair put down the mugs while he waited for the tea to brew and the coffee to finish. Backed in the corner, he stood there, his arms out beside him braced on the counter. 

"Listen, I didn't know he meant that much to you." 

"And would it have made any difference if you did? You didn't trust me, man. You thought I'd blow it, let those creeps think he was still alive." 

Jim shook his head, his temples pounding from his own self-inflicted guilt, the tension stressing his very skull. "I just thought I was protecting Kozinski, Chief. He'd already been wounded. We had to make them believe he's dead so he can be relocated." 

"I still think of him as Brother Marcus, Jim. You just don't understand what it felt like to think this guy I really care for had just been killed. I actually cried, man. Did that give you a thrill or something to see that? To see me lose control and try to go after the guy I thought killed him?" 

"Of course not, Blair. Why would you say that?" His heart gripped his chest, the pain a tangible force tearing at the straining muscle. 

The younger man looked away, focused on the tea kettle. "I saw your face, Jim. You thought I was a joke. Hell, I couldn't even break away from you and here I was going to punch out some hoodlum? Stupid ass Blair loses it. Just another joke. That's me." 

"Just stop it, Chief. That's not how it happened." 

"No?" He wrapped his arms tightly around his chest, his eyes still averted. 

"No, you were upset. I knew that, but don't you see? That's one of the reasons I couldn't tell you. Chief, listen to me. You don't hide your feelings worth shit, and you know it. If you'd thought Brother Marcus was still alive, it wouldn't have been nearly as convincing. You losing it like you did just enforced his death as fact." 

Shaking his head, his mouth open as he stared at Jim, Blair's voice trembled. "So, you planned it? You used me to make them believe it?" 

"Well, not exactly, no. It just sort of worked out that way. I didn't want to risk telling you and having you sending the signal that Marcus was really okay." 

"I wouldn't have done that, Jim. I can act when I have to." Covering his mouth, the pain obviously even more profound than before, Blair turned away. He poured the tea in one mug and the coffee in the other while each man remained totally silent. Picking up his drink, the younger man moved past Jim and sat on the couch. Not long afterwards, Jim joined him, waiting for his friend to signal when he needed to continue talking. 

Finally, sitting with his legs tucked under him, Blair spoke, his voice quiet and his words weighted and sad. "I guess it hurts for two reasons, man. I really thought Brother Marcus was dead. I mean, I'm really glad he's okay, even if he is going to have to go to another monastery somewhere." 

"Yeah, but Brother Jeremy will help him." 

Glancing up, Blair smiled for the first time in several hours. "Yeah, I know that. Hell, what do you want to bet, they'll go together?" 

Tilting his head at the odd expression, the almost tender affection with which Blair said the words, Jim asked, "Why do you think that?" 

"Jim, come on, man. Don't be dense, okay?" 

"No, seriously, what the hell are you talking about?" 

Blair took a long drink and then took a deep breath. "Jim, in case you didn't notice, Brother Jeremy's in love with Brother Marcus." 

"Fuck, Chief. Don't even play. No way." 

"Yes, way, man." 

Stunned, Jim ran his hand over his thinning hair, wondering if he really deserved to be a detective anymore. "But, Chief, isn't that like against the rules or something? I mean, I haven't read the Monk handbook or anything, but isn't hooking up while you're wearing the robes a major religious deal breaker?" 

"Yeah, it is. Doesn't mean it doesn't happen. Homosexuality isn't even a done thing in the church for anyone. Let a priest or nun or brother practice it and it's major sin time for sure. The thing is, the church can't control the heart, Jim. The first time I was out there, I kind of walked in on them talking, holding hands, very tight. Brother Marcus took me aside and I told him then I thought it was cool that he had somebody." 

Jim sank back into the cushions as he gauged his friend with a new vision. Blair always showed so much more compassion for others, so much more than the older man could ever muster. For some reason it bothered him that he couldn't find it in his heart to be so open, so forgiving. He knew he could learn a lot from his young guide, in fact, knew he already had. 

"Okay, so now a lot of what happened makes more sense, you know with Jeremy helping out Marcus. The thing is, why is Marcus so important to you, Chief? Sure, he's a nice guy and all, especially considering we now know who he really is, but what's the deal between you?" 

Jim watched his friend take another drink, his fingers drumming the side of the mug, his eyes nervous. "We talked a lot about different things, Jim. He helped me understand some things about myself that were confusing for a young guy." 

Suddenly his brain brightened. "You mean Marcus talked to you about sex?" He smiled when he saw the bright blush rouging his friend's slightly whiskered cheeks. "Come on, Chief, don't be embarrassed, just because you asked a monk about your sex life." 

His lips pursed, his face tight, Blair glared unhappily. "You know, Jim, you've got this really nasty streak in you that's very unattractive." 

His grin vanished. "Sorry. I just thought it was weird, that's all. I didn't mean to slam you or anything." 

"Sure you did, Jim. It's what you do automatically. And that's fine with Simon and the other guys, but I'm not like them. You know that. Sure, I've gotten used to it, but I don't have to like it. Thank god you've got other redeeming qualities or I'd leave your sorry ass in a heart beat." 

His own face flushed with a heat he couldn't control, unnerved by the vehemence behind the words. "I really am sorry, Chief." Definitely wanting to change the subject, he shifted on the seat and finished off his coffee before he spoke. "So, what exactly did you and Marcus talk about?" 

"Doesn't matter. The point is that we got close and when I thought he was dead, it really hurt, man." 

"I get that, Blair, I do. So, you said there were two reasons it hurt so much. Was the second reason because you think I don't trust you?" 

The grad student met his gaze, his voice soft and very even. "I know you trust me about most things, Jim. Hell, you've trusted me with your sentinel secret. I guess, that's why it hurt so much when I realized that trust didn't extend to every part of our relationship. Then when you were pretty much laughing at me, well, I just wanted to scream." 

His own voice gentle, the heated connection strong, Jim scooted in closer, his eyes never leaving his friend's. "Blair, I swear, I never laughed at you. I don't know why you're thinking that, but it's not true. It hurt to see you hurting so much." 

"But you were smiling when you were wrestling with me, man. Smiling and holding me so fucking tight when I couldn't get away." 

Breaking the eye contact, Jim stood up and walked to the window. "I didn't think you saw that, Chief. Damn." 

"So, Jim, if you weren't laughing at me for losing it, why were you smiling?" 

Wetting his lips, his gut nervous, his voice rattled the words struggling for freedom. "This is kind of embarrassing, Chief, and I'm not sure how you're going to take it." 

"Well, you won't know until you tell me, so you might as well spill it." 

Turning, Jim faced the man watching him from the couch. "I was grinning like an idiot because I liked holding you." 

Stunned silence plagued the air between them before Blair finally regrouped and spoke, his voice hoarse. "What?" 

"I know, it's stupid. It's just grabbing you like that, I mean, it just felt good. I could do it even in public and no one could say anything. You were upset and I was snatching you back for your own good, protecting you. It's sounds dumb, but I liked that feeling. I liked being able to hold you so tight without anyone thinking the wrong thing." 

"Wrong thing?" 

"Yeah, you know." 

Shaking his head, his face flushed with anxious energy, Blair bit his lower lip before his husky voice formed the command. "No, Jim, tell me what wrong thing would people think if they saw how much you get off holding me while I'm pitching a fit in public." 

"Damn it, Blair. You know what I'm saying." 

"I think I do, man, but we've had enough miscommunication for one trip. How about you say what you really mean. Let's both try it for once." 

Swallowing hard, his courage doing it's best to back out of the particular conversational direction, Jim tried to swerve away. "I just meant I like protecting you, Chief. You know that. It's part of this partnership thing we have. You watch my back and I watch yours. It's what partner's do." 

"No way, man. You're not getting off that easy. Get your ass over here and sit down. We need to talk." 

"God, you're bossy." 

"Yeah, now get over here." Jim smiled as his guide slapped the cushion beside him, his groin tightening even as he walked into the most dangerous territory he'd ever explored. 

"Okay, I'm sitting. Now what, Chief? What do you want me to say?" 

"How about, how you really feel about me, Jim? Why was it so hard to admit that you liked holding me like that?" 

"I don't know. It just was. Why are you making such a big deal out of all this? I mean, I went to your retreat, followed all the silly ass rules when Brother Jeremy took my stuff, and now you want to grill me." 

"Grill is not exactly what I had in mind, man, but it's a start." He placed a hand on Jim's wrist, the heat flaring up every never fiber of the arm. His breath hitched as his partner leaned in closer, he voice so breathy it brought on an involuntary shudder. "Jim, I'm going to tell you a secret, man. You ready?" 

"What secret?" 

"Tell me you're ready, Jim. I need to hear it. Come on, do it." 

"Okay, I'm ready. What secret?" 

The air tickled his ear as Blair stretched up and whispered, "I'm in love with you, Jim." 

His head jerked away as he stared at the man gazing at him, the dark blue barely visible with the pupil so black. "Really?" 

"Yeah, man. It's why I took you to St. Sebastian's, man. I mean, I know you never actually said anything, but I just had this feeling you were working yourself up to tell me the same thing. I wanted Brother Marcus's advice on how to tell you or get you to tell me." 

Shocked and delighted mixed like a swirling spin of colors, red and blue locked together in his vision. Blair loved him and he still wrapped his fingers around his wrist, the delicious heat branding the flesh. "I can't believe this, Chief. This whole vacation thing was a plot to tell you. That's why I got upset about going to the monastery. Somehow the idea of being in a religious order dampened the sexual thrill at revealing my true feelings. 

"Shit, Jim. Are we a mess or what?" 

Jim cupped the back of Blair's head and pulled him forward, his eager tongue probing the hot inviting mouth with a need to taste the man he wanted to swallow. Instead he gulped the string of moans vibrating, tingling all through him. The hard contrast of teeth and slick steamy inner skin thrilled him, the tang of lemon and spices from the tea wrapped with unique Blair washed his throat, spiking the energy between his legs to full throttle. 

Breaking the kiss, he rested his forehead against Blair's as he whispered. "God, I've loved you for so long. Why was it such a bitch to actually say it?" 

"I can't blame you for this one, Jim. Part of it's my fault." 

Grinning, Jim sat back enough that he could see the whole face, the flush of excitement blushing the skin. "How's that?" 

"You said before I can't hide my feelings. That's bullshit, man. I've hidden them from you for ages." 

"Damn, Chief. We've wasted so much time." 

"I know." Running his hand up Jim's chest, Blair paused and rested his palm over Jim's heart. "Let's promise not to waste any more. I know this isn't going to be easy. We're not monks, but the rule book in general is against guys like us being together." 

"Fuck the rule book, Chief." 

"Actually, fuck works, but not the book, Jim. I want you in the worst way." 

"Sounds like the best way to me, Blair. Now, come here before I have to grab you again." 

Smiling, almost teasing, the younger man's voice sounded oh so naughty. "You liked grabbing me though, didn't you, Jim? You liked the little struggle I had going on? Did that get you going?" 

The bulge between his legs complained as it struggled, trapped against the denim. It slammed his brain into a meltdown when his guide actually rubbed him, bringing Jim's hips up to push back against the hand. "God, Blair, I need you." 

"Oh, me, too, man. You want to go upstairs to the bell tower?" 

Jim stopped mid-hand hump. "Bell tower? What the hell are you talking about?" 

Blair's voice crooned as he continued to stroke and run it down deep between Jim's legs, almost back to his ass. "I've always had this fantasy about being fucked in a bell tower, man. I get pulled up the narrow steps and then while all the brothers are downstairs at vespers, I'm being fucked like crazy by some sex-frenzied monk who hasn't had any for like ages." 

Groaning, his thighs shivering from the agony of pure heaven as Blair massaged his balls through his jeans, Jim managed to mumble. "This monk guy, does he have to wear a robe or is he naked?" 

"Naked, man. He pulls me up there and strips me while he peels off the whole deal. We're boffing like bunnies in the bell tower while everyone else is sending out this really great positive vibe. God, Jim, you're so hot, man. Now, take me upstairs." 

Gulping down stubborn air, Jim blinked several times to clear his vision, the throbbing between his legs so much a focus, he could barely reason. After a few moments, Blair's voice broke through again. "Man, don't zone, Jim. Come on, listen to my voice. You hear me?" 

"Yeah, I hear you, Chief, but I want to feel you." 

He stared into a glorious smile as Blair leaned in and licked his chin. "Oh, yeah, you'll feel me. Now, come on, man, drag my ass upstairs. I'm about ready to lose it right here." 

"Me, too, Chief. Maybe we should save the bell tower games until later when I can last longer." 

Stretching himself over Jim's now reclining body, his leg between Jim's shaking thighs, he pouted. "Oh, all right. I guess I can wait. God, knows I've got tons of fantasies to play with now." 

To accent his sultry voice, he shifted Jim's body into a sitting position so he could pull down Jim's over stressed zipper. "Lift your hips, Jim. I want to see you buck naked." Sliding off both the jeans and boxers, he then stood between parted thighs licking his lips at his prize. 

His bloodless brain dizzy, Jim watched, powerless to move as he witnessed his partner's quick disrobing. Powerful twitching clenched his ass cheeks when he saw Blair's cock bounce free, it's cut crown pearly smooth and creamy from leaking. The dark purple flesh jutted out in contrast against the nest of jet black curls between well-muscled, hairy thighs. Kneeling between his legs, his guide engulfed him, the heat searing up his belly to chest, to lava spilling down his brain into his sizzling eye sockets. Bright reds soared and flashed to white and yellow. "Shit. Oh, my god." 

Gasping for air as his hips pumped automatically, he grabbed the back of Blair's thick curls, his fingers wrapped with silky strands. The savage tongue traced his extended veins, lapped at the tip, before the whole mouth gobbled up with tiny nips all along the edge of burning thick cock. Thinking vanished beyond sensation, his ass probed by a daring finger, his balls rolled by a palm, lips sucking him with slick watery sounds that spread a windy firestorm up through his very center. 

Nothing mattered but the glorious grip of his guide as he spun around in a huge maelstrom of tightening muscles coiled to painful pressure, the pleasure only seconds away, the intensity of explosion so great he ground his teeth and bloodied his own tongue. The spasm gripped and held him, paralyzed his bones, one wave after another as he whirled into a chasm of pure joy, an abyss so delightful, he surrendered willingly to fall forever. God, Blair, he loved him. 

Returning to himself, he found his lover still slurping away at his shrinking cock, licking and sipping away at every drop hungrily. One quick caress of whisker against thigh brought on another quick shudder tensing his spine. "You're going to kill me, Chief." 

"Oh, man, last rites and resurrection, that's a great fantasy, too, Jim." 

Groaning as Blair crawled up and straddled his lap, he embraced the smaller man to his chest, his eyes squeezed shut against the intrusion of reality. The bare ass against his exhausted cock thrilled him, excited him beyond the need for an erection. Holding on tight, he whispered. "I love you so much, Blair." 

"God, I should hope so. Don't think I go down like that for just any guy, Jim." Sex-swollen lips kissed him, the lingering musk of his own semen strong and hearty, a rush to his own system. 

Suddenly, his brain function returning, Jim reached down and stroked Blair's spent cock. "Thank god. I'm sorry, Chief. I got carried away and forgot to share the glory." 

"No problem, Jim. I took care of it." Playfully, he wiggled his fingers. "See, two hands, man." Letting himself fall forward, chest to chest, Blair lowered and rested his head over Jim's heart. "Next time, it's the bell tower and you can have the honor, okay?" 

"Okay." A lazy hand massaged a slow circle over his shoulder and down his arm. "Blair?" 

"Yeah?" A drowsiness roped the words, slow and dreamy. 

"Where'd all this religious fantasy stuff come from?" 

"It's just fantasy, man. Don't analyze it. That's my deal. Just enjoy it. Besides, I'm sleepy. Falling in love and going down all in the same day after all that happened at St. Sebastian's wore my ass out. Want to take a nap, man?" 

"In the bell tower?" 

"Oh, yeah. God, I love you, Jim." 

"Then you'd better be ready to study the scriptures, Chief, 'cause I plan to be your new religion." 

"Hail, Jim, full of grace?" 

"More like Hail, the Chief, full of Jim." 

"Oh, god, man, did I mention the communion service fantasy?" 

* * *

The end.

 


End file.
